One Thing I Know


God is faithful.

I chose to follow Jesus at a Billy Graham crusade when I was nine years old. I grew up in church, but that was the first time I felt God speaking to me. Drawing me to him. I devoured the book of John in the bus on the way home which gave me a glimpse of how much Jesus loved me.

I’d like to say that my life was perfectly great after that, but that would be a lie. Family situations, my own rebellion, and outside events led me into many, many messed up situations.

But God is faithful.

Always there, even when I though he was mad at me. (See last week’s post) As I tried to be good enough for him. (He didn’t ever say that I needed to be.) When I rebelled and did my own thing even when I had his still, small voice tugging at me to go a different way. Through every heartache, broken place, trial, and daily life, he has walked beside me or called to me when I ran ahead or off somewhere.

Nearly every morning lately I’ve been listening to a collection of songs by Phil Wickham. This one makes me cry every single time. Why?

Because God is faithful. Jesus loves me.

And I just wanted to share that he’s there for you too.

It’s Always Been You

Phil Wickham

You saw me first
You let me in when I was at my worst
The moment when I heard You say my name
It’s the first time in so long I’m not afraid
I’m not afraid

You are the voice that calms the storm inside me
Castle walls that stand around me
All this time, my guardian was You
You are the light that shines in every tunnel
There in the past, You’ll be there tomorrow
All my life, Your love was breaking through

It’s always been You
It’s always been You

My northern star
Your love will be the compass of my heart
Oh, I just wanna be right where You are
Right where You are

You are the voice that calms the storm inside me
Castle walls that stand around me
All this time, my guardian was You
You are the light that shines in every tunnel
There in the past, You’ll be there tomorrow
All my life, Your love was breaking through

It’s always been You
And it’s always been You
It’s always been You
It’s always been You

Who stood with me in the fire?
It was You, it was always You
Who pulled me out of the water?
It was You, it was always You
And who carried me on their shoulders?
It was You, I know it’s You, You

You are the voice that calms the storm inside me
Castle walls that stand around me
All this time, my guardian was You
You are the light that shines in every tunnel
There in the past, You’ll be there tomorrow
All my life, Your love was breaking through

It’s always been You
And it’s always been You
It’s always been You
It’s always been You
It’s always been You

Moving Out, Moving On, Moving Up Part 7


Christmas 2013 at the Bennet house

Christmas.

Different this year. Not only for us, but for so many people. Loved ones lost, jobs in limbo, crime escalating through the world.

But even though it may be different because we don’t know where we’ll be, and our Christmas decorations are in storage, is my lack of a Christmas tree going to change the fact that Jesus was born for us?

I don’t think so.

I’m realizing that in the grand, eternal scheme of things much of what we do at Christmas will not make or break it.

Aww…but I want to bake, and decorate, and hang the stockings with care.

Yet, God wants us to reframe our lives and our business to function from a place of his direction. He wants to clear out any distorted thinking, pride, fear, or self-reliance. The Lord is showing us how to live like the original followers of Jesus, funneling his provision through each other to help whoever needs it whether in the church or outside it.

His heart and focus are on those who don’t know him yet or have moved away from him.

He wants us to literally lay down our lives, die to self, and put others needs and interests ahead of our own.

Hey, isn’t that what Christmas is really all about?

God, the Word, came to us in the flesh. Not as God, but laying aside his position, his rights, his authority to be born in a dirty, smelly place with animals. Appearing to the lowliest of the community, the shepherds—who, by the way, knew what it meant to lay down their lives—the angels gave them the privilege of being the first to meet their Savior and spread the news.

After all, who else better to recognize the Lamb of God?

I’ll bet people thought they were crazy.

Maybe they were mocked. Ridiculed. What would a shepherd know about a bright light and a baby king? Did that make any sense?

The mother was a mere girl not even from their town. Really?

Rumors seeped through the community that her husband wasn’t really the father.

I’m pretty sure there are a few folks who wonder what the heck we’re doing. Temporary housing, couch surfing, letting our son fend for himself. (He is a nineteen-year-old college student with a solid job, not twelve, after all.) If I were looking at my life from the outside, I’d wonder what’s going on with us too.

It makes no sense.

Unless…God.

Praying, waiting, worshiping, waiting, reframing our thinking, waiting, searching, waiting…God has given us specific visions. It doesn’t make sense. Nothing can happen without his hand moving mountains. But he fed thousands of people with a few fish and loaves of bread. We’re opening our hands and hold out what we have, believing he will do miracles with that little bit and our sometimes-shaky faith.

Michael Todd, Pastor of Transformation Church in Tulsa, OK in his messages of crazy faith and crazy(er) faith says

“It’s only crazy, until it happens.”

Michael Todd

That’s what Mary and Joseph must have thought when Jesus was born. Maybe it’s what Simeon and Anna, who had waited and prayed for Messiah thought when they met him.

“It’s only crazy, until it happens.”

Then, can we acknowledge that it’s God?